“America's a family. We all yell at each other. It all works out.”

“The problem is, the more famous you get, the more people see you who didn't choose to.”

“When two kids are being completely berserk, and they're naked and throwing food around, sometimes I just let it go because I can see a future where they're going to be dressed, and they're going to be at school. So I kind of let stuff go sometimes.”

“I wish I could know everything ever, like that would be my wish - that's what I hope heaven is, that they tell you who shot JFK and all that stuff.”

“To me, art supplies are always okay to buy.”

“I have a crazy amount of different jobs, so the way I manage that is to not do more than one at a time. It's like old computers that had small memory chips, they would do something called swapping, where they would fill the memory with one task, do it and get it out.”

“When I was first divorced, I started dating younger women, and it was really exciting. But after a while I was like, 'This is just dumb.'”

“I've met a lot of people who've lost their jobs and they still have a sense of humor.”

“Breaking records is not something you expect to be doing. That's like a sports thing, it's not usually a comedy and writing thing.”

“A lot of the struggle I had with movies is I really loved moments and tones and feelings in a scene, and I loved creating those, but I never really had great stories to string them together.”

“I don't like comedy. I like funny things. I don't like comedy. Like, comedy movies are just, 'Oh Jesus.'”

“I grew up watching all these crazy movies, European movies and stuff, and I guess that I always laughed at things that were a little more offbeat.”

“I've learned from experience that if you work harder at it, and apply more energy and time to it, and more consistency, you get a better result. It comes from the work.”